You only need to open a magazine to see avocados plastered over every page. Avocado on toast, avocado with scrambled eggs, an avocado salad. They’re literally everywhere but only to be eaten by an elite few. My most recent trip to chicken heaven came during a low point in my life. I was suffering from third degree FOMO (fear of missing out), wishing desperately to be a part of the avocado movement. My FOMO was worse than it had ever been before and unexpectedly, my inhibitions escaped my clutch. Before I knew it, I’d uttered the phrase, ‘please add a quarter of an avocado onto that too’ when I was ordering my quarter chicken, chips and corn on the cob.
What had I just done? I couldn’t believe my momentary lapse in sense. Shocked, my head began to fill with questions that I couldn’t answer. Had I done the right thing? Is my social standing high enough for an avocado? Did the waiter at the till laugh at my request but I missed it because I was too overcome by the situation? Stumbling back to the table, I waited for my meal to arrive.
Looking down at my plate, I was now facing a new problem. I’d eaten avocado before, in the safety of my own home where the only person around to judge is my dog but I’d never eaten avocado in public and never eaten it as an accompaniment to an already completed meal. I was feeling out of my depth as endless avocado eating options began to circulate my mind. Do I go for the avocado first, eating it directly from the tiny, pristine bowl that it came in and leave the rest of the meal for later? Or do I eat the avocado at the end, like a pallet cleanser before I consider the desert menu? What if I’d missed the point entirely and proven that I truly am an avocado novice; what if those well acquainted with the beautiful green fruit (or is it a vegetable?) eat it withthe meal, and order cleverly enough that their dish of choice is complemented by the avocado.
There was a lot to consider and I was beginning to feel worried that I wasn’t prepared enough for the job. But time was running out and my hunger was forcing me to make a decision. In a panic-driven move, I adopted the all-in-one method and, as gracefully as my hunger ridden body could manage, I pilled as much onto my fork as possible.
The first bite confirmed that I had made the right choice but I couldn’t stop myself from devouring the entire dish. There was a party in my mouth and the avocado was definitely welcome. I can’t imagine that there has there ever been a more delicious meal than medium spiced chicken, chips, a corn on the cob and an avocado quarter. I walked out of Nandos a different person than I walked in. The avocado had changed me; I was a new woman, a healthier woman, a more sophisticated woman, and most importantly of all- I was an avocado eating woman.